Paragliding Adventure 2008

Here's a video I posted on YouTube with pictures and video from our paragliding adventure in Interlaken, Switzerland a couple of weeks ago.

5 Things We Hate About Freddy

we hate it when you're happy

laughing all the time

we hate it that you are so smart

translating every line

we hate it that you're pretty

a smile upon your face

we hate that you're so faithful

living out God's grace

But now that you are leaving

our heart just feels depressed

because we REA LLY love you

and think that you're the best

I Hate Flower Bags: Or Why I'm Pretty Sure Women Will One Day Rule The World

In one of my favorite books ,The Princess Bride by William Goldman, he begins by giving an account of how Buttercup becomes the most beautiful woman in the world. Apparently before Buttercup, a maid in some king's court held this "cherished" title. Of course, this didn't escape the jealous eye of the queen. In order to rectify this problem (and allow her husband to rule without distraction) she played interior decorator by leaving bowls of bonbons throughout the castle. Twenty pounds later the queen had solved her "problem" and Buttercup was one step closer to Miss Universe.

It seems, I've recently discovered, that such deviousness is not just wasted on taking out other women who may be stumbling blocks to their sinking self-esteem. Take my wife for example. We recently got a new laptop. It's fast. It's shiny. It would probably mow the grass if we had any (and if we put it down long enough for it to work its magic). So what does Kelly do? She puts in a green and brown flowered computer bag. To say this bag is ugly would be an injustice to the word ugly. I had no idea such hideousness existed outside of west Texas but I guess I was wrong.

Now I became quite depressed (which I was prone to already) when she simply replied to my apparent distaste by saying, "well . . . I like it." I like it? How am I supposed to respond to this in my fragile condition. After all, it takes great courage for me to have this bag sitting on the floor of my living room . . . much less be seen with it in public. What if she needs me to carry it?

But then the light came on. She doesn't want me to carry it!!!! The fact is she wants it all to herself. So the utilitarian purpose of the "bag from hell" is not to carry said computer from point a to point b, or even to be "pretty." A true cynic would even conclude she probably hates it herself. Instead the bags are designed (and probably marketed) as men repellers. And I can testify as to their effectiveness. I am convince my beautiful computer is infected with ugly bag cooties.

So what chance do we men have against such deviousness? Not much, by my estimation. We've been fooled into complacency when CNN reports there's only 14 world leaders who are women. Merkel seems harmless enough. Then one day. BAMMM!!! Flower bags for everyone. Men just don't have that kind of patience. It seems Star Wars would have been much more believable if Palpatine had been an empress.